Communication is the Key

Communication is the essence of what we do. Many might say it's the premier and most essential management trait. While I personally believe our character ethic comes first - with out proper communication you can not and will not be an effective leader.

Why do people struggle with communication? It's my belief it comes from a couple deeply rooted psychological aspects.

1) Lack of Confidence - Maybe we struggle with articulation and feel we will be miss understood. We may fear the follow up questions that come next or how we will respond to disagreements. This relates to us all in some way or another as we all at some point second guess ourselves and limit our potential. We worry about other's perception and judgments.
2) Avoiding Confrontation - If what we are trying to communicate is feedback in some shape or form that critiques someone else there is a desire to avoid offending. How do we get our point across in an effective helpful way that will not make that individual defensive or upset?

Then there are those that will attempt to communicate but do it poorly. They offend others and are emotional in their communication. They may try any of the following:

1) Request's
2) Pleading
3) Reasoning
4) Bribing
5) Threatening
6) Overpowering

The problem with these techniques is they fail to address the core root of the problem. There is a true lack the emotional maturity that leads to the inability to understand the other person's point of view - which is the key to true communication.

I might take the advice of a pretty good teacher and leader from the past when communicating with another person. This advice may be the greatest leadership advice out there:

"Do unto others as you would have them do unto you."

Try the following:

1) Listen and Connect. Earnestly listen to their concerns and connect with what they are saying. Don't just do it - encourage them to express any disagreements they may have. This gives you a chance to set an example on how to take feedback with a positive attitude.
2) Know the why's. Clearly explain why we do what we do. Explain in detail our purpose and reasoning. If you don't know why or there is not a crystal clear understanding on your part - then you are WRONG.
3) Compromise. Be willing to give and meet at a middle ground. I know this is difficult - but ask yourself "what is the greater good." Don't allow your ego to stand in the way of progress.
4) Be Accountable. Hold your subordinates accountable, but more importantly hold yourself accountable. Follow up where you say you will follow up. Call when you say you will call. Apologize if you make a mistake. Set the right example.

We will all error. Unfortunately its a fact of life. What matters is what you do next.